“11 Things I Learned Coming Back Into Design After Mat Leave”

After 11 months of maternity leave, I returned to work in a new role, as a design director.

 

Sounds exciting? Something I’d be ready for? A new challenge after nappies, weaning, and nap battles?

 

True, sort of. But what was also true was that motherhood had completely unravelled me.

 

As a woman in the creative industry with my mind set on being a leader, I was all the things you’d expect – headstrong, raring for success, in control.

 

When I left for maternity leave, I was confident, self-assured and pretty together for the most part. When I returned, I was scared, fragile and quite frankly, a bit of a mess.

 

“Walking back into the studio, I felt like a complete alien.”

 

After so many years soaring between successes at work, the past 11 months of challenges outside of my usual remit had taught me nothing but to expect struggle.

 

I’d done a complete rebrand. My values, personality and point of view had all changed.

 

Before I returned to work, I read so many things about how being a mother would only make me a better manager, delegator, problem solver and juggler. But walking back into the studio, I felt like a complete alien.

 

Motherhood had consumed me, and for that time away from work I lived in a fictitious world, submerged in an alternate reality. Then suddenly one day, I was simply back to it.

 

So, what has got me through the transition from new mum, to new mum and design director?

 

1. Establishing balance is a myth

The two will never be 50/50 with one aspect of life always needing you more than the other. And spoiler alert, those moments will often hapen when you’re trying to be committed to the opposite thing. Trust your instincts to put your time where it needs to be.

2. Remember you’re more than just a parent and a worker

Make time for the person you are when you’re not committed to anything. This will help keep your sanity.

 

3. Know your worth

You’re new to this but so are your peers. So know that you’re learning together, and any moments of friction are opportunities for development to establish and celebrate the reality of mothers back in work.

 

4. Work for a CEO who is also a mother (Not a must but wow, does it help)

I often see my CEO drop everything when her children need her, even now when they are at university age.

Recently she was asked to name her best investment, financially or time wise. I naively expected a business answer, what I read was something unexpected, but totally relatable – “The time I spent playing with my children when they were little.” Though it feels like you’re alone, you’re never truly alone.

 

5. Commit more to less

Your era of over committing isn’t right now. So put your hand down and don’t bloody worry about it.

 

6. Hard conversations cultivate greatness

It might not feel that way at the time, but it will always benefit the outcome.

 

7. Have less patience

For things that aren’t meaningful or purposeful, don’t be afraid to get to the point and cut out the frills. It becomes a survival mechanism to simplify an increasingly complex life.

 

8. Find your advocates or help create them

You’ll find yourself in an ever-cycling monologue of reasserting the same boundary. So find your advocates and give them a clear brief on where you stand, so it doesn’t feel like you’re the only one in your corner.

 

9. Back yourself

Being a mother and a creative leader is a force to be reckoned with. Those who think otherwise just don’t understand your experience. And it’s not a reflection on your worth, but their understanding.

 

10. Working dads are parents too

We need to ensure that dads also have support and flexibility to provide childcare and to work, so that the responsibility of both can be equally shared (and enjoyed).

 

11. Being a working mum is not one-size-fits-all

Often working mothers are painted with the same brush, but every mum is different. Don’t feel devalued just because someone can do something you can’t right now.

 

12. A cheeky extra – but a crazy reminder that you’re literally propelling the human race at home and at work!

 

Sarah Goldthorpe Sykes is design director at Born Ugly.

 

Source: Design Week